King laugh

Okay, so this post was supposed to be another zany, good-natured time-killer about me putzing around the city yesterday and having a really good time watching the buskers and finishing my Christmas shopping and feeling really smug about that, blah blah blah.

And then I woke up and this had fucking happened:

So it's a good thing, I guess, that I've learned how to keep myself occupied with very little here in Edinburgh, as I will clearly not be making it home EVER. Commence forcibly cheerful recollection of yesterday's doings while suppressing onslaught of tears nnn...now.

Hahaha, yesterday was so much fun! Isn't Edinburgh just the greatest city, so fun for Christmas, so nicely decorated? Oh gee, what a great day I had! I had gone down to the Christmas Market again with friends Friday night, and watched them eat amazing smelling cheeseburgers that I was too full even to attempt. THAT is not acceptable, readers. It is a personal vow of mine to leave no burger unturned in the course of my life. So I went back yesterday and got one for moi, and it was AMAZING.

The carnival on Friday night

Um, why would people pay to go ice skating when their entire city is one giant sheet of ice?

My burger. I love him.

Then I finished my Christmas shopping (smug!) and wandered around a bit more watching the street performers. Most were fairly standard: the inevitable bagpipers, young women in bandanas singing Indigo Girls and not quite hitting the high notes (hint: take the harmony then, dummies; it is, after all, the friggin' Indigo Girls), young men also singing Indigo Girls and, while pitched okay, having a more difficult time with the blatant female empowerment/lesbian lyrics. There were two standout acts, however. One was a...person playing the drums in the park by my school. Good drummer, no doubt, but his schtick was somewhat more complicated than that:

You probably can't tell from that photo...but "he" is wearing a full-body gorilla suit. I think this is a good idea. You fight the sub-zero temperatures, save yourself from the embarrasment of public performance by going incognito, and avoid the profit:hotness ratio that otherwise plagues buskers. Cheers, sirrah.

The other standout I refused to take a picture of, because I would not play his cynical little game. This man had placed himself upside down in the middle of the sidewalk, standing on his head in a bucket. That was it. That was his entire act. When he heard money clink into his cap, he would wave vaguely in a general direction as thanks to the donor. THIS DOES NOT COUNT, I SAY. What kind of talent are we rewarding here, anyway? A miraculous lack of shame or pride? Really strong neck cords? The fact that you're backing up pedestrian traffic for like three blocks? There are STANDARDS to be kept.

Anyway.

Later in the evening I met a friend for movie night, and did we ever pull out the stops! Hot cocoa with Baileys, roasted chestnuts and The Muppet Christmas Carol make for the best Saturday night.

Only the greatest holiday movie of our time. Stuff it, It's a Wonderful Life.

Roasted chestnuts! How festive!

Mmmmmmmmmmmm...

I give it a thumbs up.

We are not nerds.

So I was in a great mood as I went to bed, looking forward to two last days of preperation before flying home to Christmas with my family. I should have known better. We've now gotten approximately three inches of snow in the last three hours, which, while that doesn't sound so dire, means that the entire country will once again be brought to a complete standstill until god and/or mother nature takes pity on these poor helpless people. God, MAN UP, SCOTLAND.

I need to go cry now.